Lily's Maniacalobsessive diary
by MJMurdock
Summary: I will not get angry with Potter just because he is goodfornothing, I will not get angry with Snape just because he is selfish, I will not get angry with Petunia just because she is stiff, goodfornothing and absolutely selfish.


Lily's maniacal-obsessive diary – Chapter One.

Mary Jane: I have finished this fanfiction in Spanish and I was a bit… sad about finishing it so I decided to expand my horizons. Not a single character (except Deidre and Ned, is mine, they all belong to JKRowling! God bless ger for creating them and damn her for killing…mmmm.. MJ, no spoilers, not yet)

Lily opened the Christmas present, she was quite surprised, there it was, as every year, the present from her sister, the most muggle-ish thing she could ever find, a sad purple diary. She left it on her bed and went on opening presents.



December 27th

New and just started diary,

Good night. I feel the need to say that I have never been able to stand this shabby diaries my sister sends me every Christmas. They always, with no exception, end at the bottom of my trunk, I mean, in the part that's full of dust and dirt… I have never written more than 15 pages. Well, I'm tired and I'm half-asleep so, good night…

December 30th

Coffee: 2, Brownies and other sweet things: 10. Presents in the bin: 3.

We did some kind of party in the common room yesterday, this time I have stayed at school because my sister has taken her boyfriend for Christmas and I don't fit in my own home (for volume and number of people reasons). I would not be surprised if Vernon was a wizard and transformed himself to a gigantic ball.

Maybe I am way behind the times, maybe everyone is way behind MY times. I felt like a fool yesterday, drinking butter-beer while, a bit to close to me, there was my best friend, I repeat, BEST FRIEND, snogging that bastard: Nedd Precker. I hate him, I hate them, both. I get sick just thinking of that stupid Potter laughing at me… I should not be surprised of it anyway: Me, shaking that red and golden flag, and drinking butter-beer again and again, with than inexpressive look on my face. I hate red and golden flags, I hate Nedd Precker, and I hate my face. I am going down to the kitchen to get some more butter-beer.

January 1st

Food I should not have eaten: 700 tones. Coffee: 5. Sweet things: lost count when I saw the brownies.

I hate when I sit down, I can fell the fat. I hate it. And most of all I hate the blond and pretty girls that go around, near Potter "Mr. Desperate", whispering loud enough: "Am I fat?" just because that is how he gets to notice how damn slim and extremely un-dressed they are.

I have my doubts about Mr. Potter's virginity. I think I should stop insulting him just for being so immensely selfish and stupid, I should feel pitiful for him…

Anyway, Happy New Year.

January 2nd

Coffee: 3. Sweet things: 0 (I am a saint, mistress, queen and goddess of diet, even if it is just because I went to the library before the deserts were served) Food I should not have eaten: all (just enough, so I will not faint on the way to the Gryffindor tower)

Lily Evans, your subconscious speaking: ¡You must study hard!

I think part of me thinks she is a super-goddess and wants to pass the exams by just not studying, I spent the day reading, nothing is a lot, if you want to get distracted. I have even been talking to Lupin, damn laziness.

January 3rd

Coffee: 1(enough, lucky I did not fall asleep in class) Sweet things: 2 (Enough, lucky I did not faint and ended up as an inanimate carpet in the common room)

I am a genius, I have managed to get Lupin explaining me everything we have to study, and he will check with me the entire program tomorrow morning. ¡Yes!

And, if he does so, I will get to follow the classes I have missed because of some kind of … spell that makes me forget everything I am studying even if I read it five times. It is not that I am silly, not that my cerebral mass has been reduced to a 30, it is just that… It is 7th course, and if Snape gets 03 less than he had last year (that means 97 for his medium mark) I think I am going to kill for a 5. Deidre, one of my best friends, says it is just pro-finishing-school stress… but I think they are putting something in our food.

January 5th

Coffee: 1. Sweet things: 6 (¡It- is- over! ¡If I go on like this they will start thinking I am going to replace the fat lady when we finish school!) Times I have fantasized about killing Slughorn: today: 3, last week: 7.

I will have to go to the muggle psychologist, I am tired of Potter's little jokes, they are always about me, being, as I am, Slughorn's favorite student. ¿Can't he stop repeating everything Slughorn says? He does it, at least 15 times until I turn around and look at him. Lupin says he is just trying to get my attention… that he is not so stupid…No- way! How the hell al I supposed to believe that?

January 6th

00:05… no, 00:06… ehem, 00:10

Everyone is distracting me so I am not writing down the time any more. Lupin is so cute. I love him so much… as a friend. Arg! Ok, I am not imagining him THAT way never again. He has been until… now, explaining everything of History of Magic, because I somehow, though I have drunk like 5 cups of coffee, have been sleeping 59 minutes of the hour-during class.

January 8th

Coffee: 2. Sweet things: 4 and a remarkable chocolate pie that was really delicious.

Lupin is, somehow, replacing Deidre as friend. It is all because silly Deidre has no inner elegance and spends all day talking about silly Ned. I do not want to have a single boyfriend in my life, I hate men. Except genius-Lupin. I want to have nothing to do with them. They are there only to procreate. I do not even believe that myself but it doesn't really matter.

I am going to follow Deidre's advice, it is a bit late, but I will. I am going to do some things better this year.

New year's resolutions:

I will study hard. All the afternoon to get a five.

I will not spend so much of Dad's money in chocolate. (Too late)

I will save money to buy that expensive elegant raincoat I like so much. And matches with my boots.

I will make a friend between the Marauders, (done!) (I think I am cheating, I am not supposed to remember things I have already done, but trying to list things that will make me better).

I will find something to say against the one-way conversations with Deidre.

I will eat a maximum of 2… ok, 1 sweet thing a day.

And, just a cup of coffee, for breakfast.

I will not get angry with Potter just because he is good-for-nothing.

I will not get angry with Snape just because he is selfish.

I will not get angry with Petunia just because she is stiff, good-for-nothing and selfish.

I will not fall in love with someone I can not reach. As I will not fall in love with someone who is obsessed with Quiddich, already has a girlfriend, smokes in pipe, sings opera while he sleeps (rare but true), is a pervert, as pederast, or makes me feel a pederast.

I will order my books by subject. They are piled up in my trunk.

I will get up as soon as I wake up, and I will not spend Saturday and Sunday morning in my room, in pyjamas.

I will spend more time with Lupin. Out of the common room… I mean, not studying.

I will not think about what people say, nor get obsessed about it.

I will not defend the ones who don't thank me for it.

I will not be worried about what Deidre says about my sentimental life because she does not really care about it.

I will follow Lupin's advice about feeling better after writing a diary.

I will enjoy life just as it is.

I will not try to save the world.

I will do every thing on this list.

Mmmh… what day is today? Mmmh… January 15th

Bad day. Very bad day. I 've not seen Lupin in the whole day. And I have not understood a word the teacher said in Divination class.

I entered the room and saw the professor in the chair she is always sat on, right behind the table she always has her things on, with the books she always has… now I understand what they mean by "If you do not have fun at school it is because you don't want to".

"Aren't you looking forward to start the class Miss. Evans?" she said inexpressively, after the curtain of white hair.

No, I thought. I have never wanted to know if I was going to die old and lonely or if I was going to be killed by a Doberman.

There was no trace of Lupin. Besides, Potter and the rest were in a corner of the room taking out the books with a half-asleep look. I wanted to know if Lupin was right, but I did not feel like hearing James Potter making jokes about the rest of the class so I go on the defensive. I can't help complaining when he is laughing at the others right on their face.

At the end of the class I approached. I asked the short chubby boy who is always with them about Lupin, and he answered really rudely. So I went straight to Black to ask him but… Potter saw me first. He turned around when I was about to tell Black if Lupin was depressed or something… but I could not even look at Black, I didn't have time to do it… Potter was already staring at me.

"Hi, Potter." I said, serious, boring, laconically.

He smiled; I saw that glance of evil that is always on his eyes.

"Have you seen Lupin?" I managed to say, while he was concentrated in finding a way to make my brain explode in anger.

"Not here" still smiling.

"I can see that"

"I know"

Sirius Black laughed and turned around to see me.

Why the hell he is so damn selfish, stupid and disgusting? I am talking about Potter, not lovely Lupin, nor Black. And, guess what? To make this worse, my new gown is torn up in two. Well it is because sometimes… I fall down stairs.

I am going to end up in a psychiatric center. It is true I read it this morning in the glass ball.

January 17th

23:53 Ehem… life is so beautiful, I have been all day flirting with Nedd Precker. Ups.

End of chapter.

Mary Jane: Thank you for reading, please if there's any problem qwith the translation let me know! Thanks!


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